Beyond the Smile!

She smiles
when lights go on
delight on the likes
blushes on the shouts
poses,waves and hair flips.

when night falls
she hides
her scars run deep
with dirty dark secrets
the ghosts of her past
hoovering in the dark
she shivers
wet her pillows
she stands
switch on the lights
only to find
mirrors staring at her
with the dark lines
of her mascara

                           
                           

My Speech

I prepared my speech

Walking down the village

Jumping up and down the hills

Singing like a little freed bird

Helping old women carry their loads off their shoulders

I scribbled it down

Waking up early every Monday

Have school work done by every Friday

Cleaning the church every Saturday

Singing in the choir every Sunday

My speech was coloured

With my morning long walks to school

Filled with doubt and wonder

When it rained and when it thundered

It was sealed by my commitment to read at the candlelight

I put every word together

When the moon came out and I sat there quietly

Counting the stars like I am one of them

And down the river each cold morning

When I soaked my body in the ice cold running water

I had it all figured out

As I climbed the steep hills to our little house

Singing while balancing my can of water for the day

When the sun came out to warm my skin

And the Kilimanjaro in its glory

Was left bare for me to see

My Speech was corrected

Every time my aunt scolded me for my work

Every minute I had to write an essay of apologies

Every time I fell down going up the hills

Every single minute I was told you can’t have it

Every moment grandma kind eyes said she can’t do much

I had it all pieced together

When mama said I was the brightest

When grandma assured I was the kindest

When dad affirmed I was the strongest

When my siblings looked at me with their hopes at best

When friends called me the fiercest

When I finally knew my place

I rewrote it

When I realised there are no deadlines

To what I had in mind

When I knew I was the one

To write my ending

When I came to realise

I dint have to be like everyone

When I came to terms

With the journey I will walk alone

I am my speech

It’s written all over me

The cheers of my friends on my smile

The scorns of my enemies at my back

The scars of the falls on my ankles

The sparkle of my victories in my eyes

The depth of my love and passions

Deeply felt by the people I have touched

The happiness in my baby’s laughter

The peace in me when I go to sleep

It’s all me and so much more

Ready to walk on

What a journey to behold

To find the left pieces

To fit them in the empty places

And complete my speech of a lifetime

It is not an acceptance speech

For the award I am to win

Or the appreciation I will be accorded

I know if I don’t win a thing

I will definitely be the best version of me

The Rain

I will not go out
The little pathway to my house is flooded
It has become a raging river carrying everything away
 if I dare go out I don’t know what next can happen
My little home and child might be carried away

I really want to go out
To earn my bread
Get something to cook for me and my girl
But my little stall  at  the roadside
Has been carried away

If I go out
I might not be able to come back
The little bridge to my house
Is about to be washed away
With the heavy rain it won’t last a day

My madam called today
Mad I haven’t been in today
The baby has been wailing
And her clothes are not washed
And there is the rain

She complains with this rain
She cannot sit at the garden
From her third storey bedroom
She can only peep through the curtains
And watch the heavy drops hit the ground


She could later take her four wheel drive
To go to the saloon she love
Or have some tea in bed
But I didn’t come to work
If I don’t go tomorrow she says
I should not bother to go again

But if I go to work
I might be stranded on the way
The busses to our homes
Are not going  all the way
They don’t come past the highway
Please someone stop this rain

A moment of Silence

Beautiful souls
With dreams and hopes
Pride of their folks
Excited to learn
Off they went

With no clue off they took
What a beautiful group
But death ooh death
What an evil crook

He came with darkness
And a dark cloud of sadness
With his strike of coldness
He left them lifeless

As a nation we stand
In our numbness
Parents and friends
Mourning in silence

With hopes we hold hands
Tears in our eyes
May they be in  a  better place
A moment of silence

Only Before!

I have known this kind of pain
I can make it through the rain
Unlike you
I can't wait in vain

I have been here before
with no hopes for tomorrow
Moving really slow
With every blow so low

When i couldn't take no more
I stood up, started really slow
To crawl
Slowly but running  here i go
I am not waiting for you to put up a show
I have been here before

Empty Souls

Empty souls

With so much dryness

They try to fill their cup

With water from others wells

But they are never full

Never do they overflow

With shallowness

They try to dig holes

Into others wells

To dry them as well

But their souls remain

Empty spaces

With hollowness

They wonder around

Bitterness in their hearts

Venom filled tongues

Splitting evil into others

But empty they remain

With blindness

They fail to see

Clueless they move

Round and round

They stumble and fall

In their own wickedness

Their days

Are as dried up

As blown by the harmattan

Their souls

Are as lifeless

As the Atacama desert

She wept Silently!

She was taught of  silence
To be quiet and  listen
Not to ask
Have some pounded bitter herbs
Drink some warm water
And hush hush the pain

She was taught of endurance
This time each month
To keep on with her chores
While her body  in chaos
Her legs numb and heavy
Her price of womanhood

She was told to be a woman
How would you stand labour pain?
If you cannot take this little pain
How would she explain?
And if she tried to tell in vain
She will loose anyway

Now she is told it’s all her fault
She gave her womb to her witchcraft
And had too many abortions
She isn’t a woman enough
And still she lingers in her pain

She is now all grown
Have a mind of her own
Their hopes long gone
But she still holds on
To these dreams of her own
Once to hold her own

The Dancers

They don't know this song
But they dance to it
Not before have their ears met this beat
But they will break a leg for it
They don't understand this tune
But they marvel at it
Won't follow the rhythm
But will move to it
Forget about steps
They will be good at it


The drums are too loud
The dust raising high
Covering their eyes
But they dance
Their feet thumping...thumping
On the dried brown earth
Forgetting their sorrows
With no hopes for tomorrow
For the love of this music
They have never heard before 

Her Little Wins!

This time, if it happens this time

I swear

This is the last time

It was my fault, all of it

This last time

See, I hadn’t made him his favorite food

For a very long time

He isn’t that bad, didn’t he take me to Dubai ?

But this time I swear

This time I leave

I made him do it, all of it

This last time

See, I was stubborn and thoughtless

For a very long time

He isn’t that heartless; he got me my dream jeep

But this time I swear

This time I leave

I was stupid

This last time

See, I enjoyed food so much and got myself fat

For a very long time

He isn’t that horrible, he didn’t bring her to our home

Like the other time

But this time I swear

This time I leave

What do you want this time

He will ask every time

This time, a car…a house…shopping…a boutique

 He isn’t that bad

There will be a next time

And I will go to Paris

Maybe china for my merchandise

Or just Thailand to relax

That will be the very next time

But this time I leave

That time

The other time

The last time

The very last time

This time

There will always be

Another time

The Title

Malaya
Look at how she walks, does she have to swing her hips like that?
Eti they say her body naturally shakes with her moves,is she boneless?
Lies, must be lies
She is nothing but Malaya

Malaya tuu
Look, how did she get her promotion?
Eti I  hear she was an A student and had a great work record, didn't i have the same?
Lies, must be lies
Ni malaya tuu

 Malaya sana
 Look, she only dated rich ones,and now married a rich prince
 Eti she say she loves him
 Lies , Must be lies
 Malaya sana

 Malaya Mkubwa
 Look, she had an affair with her madam husband..
 Eti she claimed he raped her, her, only the housemaid
 Lies, Must be lies
 Malaya Mkubwa

 Malaya wa kutupwa
 Look, she got an A when we all failed...
 Eti she says she is a brilliant student, brilliant more than all of us?
 Lies,Must be lies
Malaya wa kutupwa

 Malaya Kubuhu
 Look, she got the nomination to the parliament ...
 Eti she says she has done a lot for the people, more than all of us?
 Lies, Must be lies
 Malaya Kubuhu

 Malaya kashindikana 
 Look, she left her husband to seek for other men…
 Eti she says he did beat her to a pulp,he had mistresses, who doesn't?
 Lies, must be lies
 Malaya kashindikana

 Malaya kupindukia
 Look, she now has a big business, her air tickets are all now business
 Eti she brags she took a bank loan to grow her business, which loan?
 Lies, must be lies
 Malaya kupindukia

 Malaya wa barabarani
 Look, she had a number of lovers before her husband, she is now a born again Christian...
 Eti she told him she has changed,don't they all say that ?
 Lies, Must be lies
 Malaya wa barabarani


 Malaya
 They are all the same
 Everyone of them Malaya
 Each and everyone of them
 Just Malaya